How Our Actions Shape the Personal Development of Others

This is true most of the time. A great example of this is when you tell people not to eat hot dogs because they are bad for our health in the long run, but then you start eating them yourself. People will see this, question you, and, most importantly, they won’t follow your advice. Today, I realized that actions have a massive impact on the development of a person’s personality.

This afternoon, I had a conversation with a friend who mentioned, in the middle of our chat, that he had never told his father, “I love you.” This sparked a thought in my mind. As he continued, he shared that his father is also not very expressive. My friend isn’t expressive with his father now, either. If the father is the role model and the person who spends the most time with his son, then his actions, or lack of actions, are reflected in the child. If the father isn’t expressive, my friend, in turn, will not be either. Right?

This conversation made me think about how the way we act impacts the people we’re around most of the time, especially our parents. I noticed that my parents have become more lighthearted with us because I sparked that change. I made my mother vulnerable by expressing love to her, and in turn, she started expressing it back. The way we influence people takes time, but when done subtly, it has a long-term positive effect.

I really like a quote I found online once: “Be the representative of what you think is missing.” - Shi Heng Yi This resonates with me because if you persevere to create a positive change and push through it, making people feel that it’s a good thing, they will eventually follow.

So, I told my friend to try telling his dad, “Dad, Happy Valentine’s Day. I love you.” He hesitated, saying it might be awkward and that his dad would probably find it strange. I responded with conviction: “Exactly, that’s the point. If you give him an emotional impact he never expected, it will be memorable and will stick with him. Starting from there, it won’t be so weird anymore. You just need to begin, and with time, it will feel natural.”

I realized this as I reflected on the awkwardness in the relationship between my friend and his father, compared to the relationship and interactions I now have with my own family. Our parents have their own problems, but I hope our conversation this afternoon convinced my friend to give it a try.

After all, family relationships are more important than any relationship with others. We come from our parents, and if they have hardened hearts, we need to start the process of softening them. We teach them, because they can't teach themselves. If no one else does, then it’s up to us, only if you care.

Ultimately, parents’ love is crucial to every child, and children need to experience that love. It’s a fundamental part of parenthood.