Keeping My Cool: From Frustration to Focus Today

Today, I managed to control my frustration while helping my friend Gerard improve his pageant candidate's performance. My goal was to significantly elevate her overall performance, but calmly pressuring her proved difficult. Whenever I offered suggestions and we reviewed them together, she'd become slightly annoyed or disinterested, despite occasionally performing well. While I understood her fatigue, her actions seemed to validate her claims of tiredness. She came across as capable, but lacked the dedication to truly push herself.

At one point, she checked her phone for schoolwork and scrolled for so long that my irritation grew. It felt like she didn't care. Suppressing the urge to unleash harsh criticism (which might discourage her), I stared out the window, searching for a way to motivate her without causing offense.

During this time, I wrestled with numerous negative and harsh thoughts, striving to restrain myself from voicing them, fearing they might discourage or upset her. Instead, I opted to silently contemplate my approach, pondering how to communicate effectively without causing harm. Eventually, I shared the topic with her, asking about her commitment to winning. Despite her initial hesitance, I suggested a more assertive approach and even demonstrated by boldly proclaiming our school film contest victory in front of Gerard and Ambo. Regrettably, my attempt at boosting her confidence seemed to have the opposite effect, leaving her intimidated rather than empowered.

Unfortunately, she seemed intimidated rather than empowered. Deciding I'd waited long enough, I informed her of my departure time (6:50) and gave her twelve minutes to fulfill my request – a sincere declaration of her desire to win. Despite my encouragement, her attempts lacked conviction. It seemed something held her back.

The issue wasn't a lack of talent, but shyness. She was more concerned with avoiding embarrassment than achieving victory. My goal was her success, hence the pressure to improve. However, pushing her wouldn't boost her confidence. She needed to find her own motivation.

With the performance approaching, the decision lies with her. Can she set aside her ego and focus on improvement? There's still time. Fearing your own declarations is a sign of guaranteed defeat. Conversely, confidently stating your goals, regardless of external opinions, increases your chances of winning (at least by 50% in my view). This, I firmly believe.

I managed my temper! Phew, that was close. Now, before I say anything, I need to consider how she might respond to different things I could say. Remember the tips that Tita Vilma gave to me. And lastly, try to take it as lightly as possible.

If she can't risk saying my request, which is as simple as a piece of cake, I wouldn't have the desire to do what Gerard requested of me. I left them to handle this blog; yet again, people deserve a second chance. We still have another opportunity tomorrow or whenever to take up Gerard's request. It's up to her; I will do it unless she becomes willing to sacrifice for this. I wouldn't do something with no chance of success.